"Cave Cannibals"

Films: Don't Go Near the Park (1979)

Alias: U-Gar, U-Tra

Type: Mystical

Location: Cave

Height/Weight: That of average humans.

Affiliation: Evil

Summary: Once again, there are shmucks in pursuit of eternal youth. Never really works out in the long run, but you gotta have a hobby. Especially when curses are involved.

History: For cannibalizing their neighbors for eternal youth, cavefolk U-Gar and U-Tra are cursed by their mother to exist in agonizing undeath for eternity. However, she adds that in literally 120 centuries, they can sacrifice a virgin when the moon is in the shadow of the two stars of the wolf. That way, they can live forever and retain their youth. But until then, they'll have to resort to cannibalism to stay alive. Flash forward to the final year, and the killings are brutal as ever, and U-Gar's had a teenage daughter groomed to be the sacrifice...jerk.

Notable Kills: It's all bare hands tearing slowly tearing through bloody flesh. Hope you're not queasy or anything.

Final Fate: In the final hour of the curse, the daughter is reluctant to be sacrificed. But as her parents close in, time runs out, and the corpses of previous victims arise and eat the two cannibals alive. The daughter forms a family of her own...but she then seems to begin taking after her parents...

Powers/Abilities: Complete immortality.

Weakness: Without blood, they will perish. Also, the deadline.

Scariness Factor: 3-These cannibals walked into their plight whether they want to admit it or not, and there's no dancing around how they had a kid just to kill her later. Their killing methods are also rather gruesome.

Trivia: -This film is also known as "Curse of the Living Dead", "Nightstalker", and "Sanctuary for Evil".

-The two were practicing a twisted form of endocannibalism, which involves eating one from the same community, before they died. The thing about endocannibalism, though, is that the food is usually dead first, even if some did it for immortality and/or special powers.


Image Gallery


Bad touch! Bad touch!

Did we really need the masks? You're already repugnant.
Thankfully, I'm too old for that sort of thing.


Yeah. This happens. Deal with it.
Who really wants to live forever?



Trailer(s)